The Sales Podcast

Bob Burg: 5 Persuasion Principles To Turn Adversaries Into Allies

Wes Schaeffer | April 25, 2014

About Bob Burg

Bob Burg is a returning guest on The Sales Podcast. You can listen to his first interview, Episode #10 here.

He has just released a new book, Adversaries into Allies: Win People Over Without Manipulation or Coercion, so I had him on to discuss selling, persuasion, influence, manipulation, and how to grow your business with honesty and integrity.

Bob's new book is a “how-to” vs a story, like some of his previous books.
We all need to master people skills.
Adversaries may actually be a nice person but if they are standing in the way of a good solution they are an adversary in that situation.
Sadaharu Oh said the pitcher is not his adversary but his partner in hitting home runs.

Influence - move someone to a desired action.
Manipulate or Persuade - they are related.
- The difference between the two begins with intent.
- Dr. Paul W. Sweats - manipulation aims at control…win-lose is the goal. Win at all costs. Persuaders seek to help the other party. “The Art of Talking So That People Will Listen.”

What is selling and what is it not? It is not convincing someone to buy something they don’t want or need.

Help people get what they need after you determine their needs.
Profit is the reward for pleasing another person. - Harry Brown
It’s all about focus. Money is an echo of value.
Be empathetic. Understand their feelings.
The one question you can ask that is pretty much guaranteed to keep a potential misunderstanding from ever actually taking place. “Please clarify / Can you please clarify?"

Self-identify with both. Be sure not to attack the person. (There are a lot of people lurking and watching the conversation to see how you are making your point - logic or insults.) “I can tell that you really do care. Like you, I want to live in a country where we can all…I think our area of disagreement is how to best go about it…” Be nice. Appear not to be so dogmatic.
Control your emotions. “Who is a mighty person? One who can control their emotions and make an enemy a friend.”
Understand why your out-of-control emotions are a problem.
This can even help you get out of a speeding ticket!
- Show respect. Apologize. Be sincere.
- “If possible…could I get off with a warning?” Give him a backdoor.
- The 8 key words “If you can’t do it, I’ll definitely understand.”